Leaking Roof in Gym's Men's Locker Room Business Letter
Business Letter Situations
For this assignment, you will compose one business letter from one of the following scenarios. These are writing situations you may come across in the professional world. You will need to make up a company name and create a company masthead to be centered at the top of your letter, and a person's name to follow the 'Dear _____,' (if you choose the Financial Planner scenario you would most likely have a program that individualizes each letter with a person's name so make up a person's name for that too). For each of these situations, consider the significant elements of the rhetorical situation (audience, purpose, genre, context) as you write.
Choose one of the following to write your Letter:
Claim Letter: You manage a small health and fitness club that leases space from a property management company. Recently the club experienced a serious leak in the ceiling of the men's locker room. You contacted the property management company to report the problem, and while a repairman did come and evaluate the leak, after 72 hours it has still not been fixed. Because of the effects of the leak, you have had to close down the men's locker room completely. Health club members are complaining and attendance is down. Inventing any reasonable details, write a claim letter to the property management company describing the problem and stating what you expect them to do to resolve it.
YOU: Manager of Fitness Center
AUDIENCE: the Property Management Company you rent the space from
PURPOSE: to get them to fix the problem ASAP
Sales Letter to Potential Clients: You are a newly hired financial planner for a well-respected finance firm and you need to write a letter introducing yourself and your qualifications to potential clients. The purpose of this letter is to try to build your client base. You may want to offer a free financial checkup or retirement readiness check. Your letter's goal could be simply trying to get clients in to meet with you and pitch them harder then, or it could let potential clients know everything you can do for them.
YOU: newly hired financial planner
AUDIENCE: list of friends, friends of friends, family members, friends of family members, and acquaintances
PURPOSE: to get them to come to your office for either a free financial checkup or a retirement readiness check and to then persuade them to be your client
How to Write Bad News Bad News Letter Format:
• Bad news is delivered indirectly
• Your intended audience forms an impression early so pay close attention to your word choice and tone
• The opening paragraph provides context - what are the circumstances of your writing today - are you responding to something? This paragraph introduces the subject/issue and establishes tone.
• Then comes an explanation - also called a buffer - review and list the facts, basically the reasons you cannot do what the reader wants you to, in an attempt to make the bad news understandable
• Then the bad News- it must be clearly stated
• Your last paragraph is the Goodwill Closing- a short paragraph that brings the reader off of the negative and onto the positive, or at the very least neutral. No apologies, no belaboring of the point.
Proofread, proofread, proofread.
When you send an email or a letter, you are representing your company so it is very important to be clear, concise and correct.
Professor
Course
Date
Business Letter
Be-Fit Health and Fitness Club, Bridgeton Building, 13th street
New York, 10011, USA
212-374-2880
Date
Braydon Jefferson
CEO Lyon Property Management Company
371, 7th Ave Crayton Building
Manhattan, New York, NY 10001
Dear Braydon,
I am writing to inform you about the leaking roof in my gym's men's locker room located at your building complex. I earlier reported to you about this problem, and you sent over a repairman who did take a look at the problem. However, 72 hours later, there is yet to be any action taken to fix the roof.
The issue has now accelerated, and the leaking space has grown a bit bigger. Due to this, the repair will be extensive, and we may need to replace the roof area that has been leaking completely. Also, part of the floor has experienced extensive damage due to the leaking water staying on the floor overnight. The tiles in the leaking area have swelled and lifted higher than the rest of the floor. The raised floor is a hazard as it can cause falls with minor and severe effects on customers in the gym. Therefore, the tiles also need some replacing to ensure no safety hazards occur within the gym.
As a result of the leak, I have had to completely shut down the locker room to avoid any health issues. However, the locker room is a central part of any fitness center, without which I cannot fully operate. My clients...